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gay nights

  • 4,433 posts

    original soundtrack: 

    official music video: 

  • 24 posts

    The Chicken wing track is better, you should have posted that first.

    ...

    Edit: This is how I delete that thing I was going to say.

  • 4,433 posts

    aw thanks tony! I'm more fond of chicken wings as well. 

    this entire 5 part piece is meant to be sort of a journey through significant experiences in my life. 

    1. Neither Here Nor There (Chicken Wings) 0:00-3:25

    this song is about indifference and feeling low. the depth of emotion in this song makes my heart ache to listen to. 

    "since you've been gone, I can't feel a thing, it doesn't matter much to me. just a kid with a key, didn't mean much of anything, neither here nor there. if I'm being honest I can't feel a thing, haven't been the same sense everything, it doesn't matter much to me." 

    the entire song is to my brother, who's passed away. it starts out with the sound of trains passing by and the clicking of heels, distant traffic and voices to capture the extreme loneliness and hopelessness you feel when you are homeless. you feel like the world is just passing you by, you're at the bottom of it just watching, and you mean nothing, to no one. 

    this is the first song I've ever written about my brother because for the longest time I haven't felt entirely sure how I felt about any of it. I really wanted to know what I felt but, I came to the conclusion that I felt a sort of indifference that was, sad. 

    I just find it to be unfortunate that my brother's life was so insignificant... to most of the world. it goes on turning without him just fine, you know what I mean. to most people he was just another guy to hit up for drugs. when I say neither here nor there I am referencing purgatory, my family is half jewish, and I personally find most of my faith placed in this religious philosophy myself, 

    and, I think about how my brother, since he's been gone he's, no where. and it's an odd sensation to feel someone become nothing. it truly is. 

    it is the true feeling of absence, is what I was trying to capture in that statement. 

    I'm just finally owning up to how I really feel about it in this song which, is captured better with the song than with words... so I'll just leave it at that. some things just can't be explained. there is no description for what I felt. because it isn't an identifiable feeling or emotion, and yet, very much so is. there just isn't a term for it. 

    it's just something you go through when you lose someone. 

    "neither here nor there" is exactly how I feel myself, a lot of the time as well. so I thought it would be a good title. 

    but I wanted to include chicken wings as a representative title for my brother strictly, since it is for him. chicken wings just represents something symbolic in my and my brothers relationship growing up that only he and I know about. personal. 

    2. Popocatépetl 3:26-3:59

    this song is about a volcano in Mexico that I used to live near. it erupted ironically after I wrote this song, kind of weird. 

    the vision for this song was for you to see what is see when I remember Mexico. 

    I went through a lot in this country, probably too much to leave here but, it was, a lot. this song is just, remembering all of it. 

    3. Asylum 4:00-6:36

    and then in this song I snap out of the dream state, where I am remembering, my brother, being homeless, living in Mexico, and I sort of wake up and find myself walking down the hallway of an asylum. the sound of slamming vault doors is what brings me back to reality. 

    this song is about the time I spent in a mental facility, it was rather lonely and it felt extremely prison like, sterile, cold. I wanted the shutting of the doors to portray the way I felt about it. being so processed, lonely, factory like. inhuman. 

    just another number in a system, another diagnosis. 

    the reason this song is sort of tripped out sounding is because I was rather fucking high during my time in the mental facility, between all the drugs they had me on I was literally wavering in and out of consciousness. things were a blurry mess of color and sound most of the time, I just, felt hella drugged up. 

    4. Oasis 6:37-9:10

    oasis is a song about the crisis with Syrian refugees. I imagined them coagulating in areas surrounding water, like camels wandering through a desert. it is inspired imagery wise by what I've seen on the internet, I also studied the issue in my sociology course in school. so it was just on my mind. it bothered me. 

    5. Jump 9:11-10:40

    jump is about the Russian viral suicide game, and I intended it sound something similar to the soundtrack of the popular internet viral sport, parkour, which seems to have spun out of Russia more than anything and eventually made its way over to the u.s. Russian roulette is also something I'd factor into this video, at the time I was troubled by a suicide dream I had, where I put a gun to my head not knowing if it was loaded or not and pulled the trigger. the next day I OD'd on heroin attempting to kill myself, the dream was symbolic of what I was going through at the time. 

    It all ties together for me though within the aspect of suicide, and the dare devil nature of Russian originated games. the latest one being a game of suicide, entailing young teens jumping off of roofs to their deaths. the video footage of these deaths impacted me. 

    I wanted the song to sound like the feeling of reckless abandon, jumping from one roof to the next and then eventually, jumping off completely. just for the fucking hell of it. 

    that's Russian culture in a nut shell. haha

  • 4,433 posts

    gay nights 

    is meant to be a joke. 

    I chose the title as a knock off from the iMovie suggested title in default editing mode that came with the trailer setting I chose, "Madrid nights" 

    I didn't think of an actual title for the song. 

    because it's not really complete. 

    if anything it's just an intro at best. 

    the recording was all one take, and part of a several hour recording session I did live, nonstop, no editing, just raw sound with the piano, and the amp settings on the mic. 

    I made up the entire song, chords, lyrics, vocals etc. as I went, and the entire session was the equivalent of an artist just doodling, or sketching out something rough. 

    it's by no means perfect, produced, or mastered. 

    it's meant to sound like, a shitty old recording, maybe taken from the back of a theater or a bar. live blues, type of thing. 

    it is inspired vocally by Whitney Houston, Christina Aguilara, janis Joplin, Stevie nicks, Nina Simone, Ella Fitzgerald, Duffy, Lana del Rey, Sia, The Weeknd, The Carpenters, Birdy, Adelle, Arianna Grande and Justin Bieber. 

    I also take inspiration from Grimes in later tracks that were from this session. that's why you hear a random cut off at the end, because there was no true ending. just wrote the entire thing off the top of my head and I kind of liked the experimental nature of it. 

    It is inspired musically by the xx, and sbtrkt, (saw them live <3) that lovely lo-fi sound, John Lennon and lady gaga, Elton John, and Pink Floyd on the intro for sure. the echoey dissonant nature. Pink Floyd experimented with the slurring of notes with electric means ( but I decided to do it with whistling. also, I was almost copying their "echoing soul singer" vibe they had going in the dark side of the moon album. unintentional but I see the similarity no doubt. this song also makes me think of chill bill, a famous whistling pop track. I like to bring experimental things into my music and this is my first time whistling in a track, I felt like bob Dylan multi tasking between whistling and singing. I wanted to give the effect that I had multiple voices. the layering of vocals is something I adopted from grimes and other indie chill wave electronic artists that play with that effect a lot. I personally love the repetition of vocals, the waterfall effect. 

    it reminds me of the intro to the "Adele" themed James Bond film recently released, with her dramatic song played over the intro of the film. I love the dark indy feel to it. I had a lot of fun making it that's for sure haha. even if it sounds complete shit, I see it's potential. 

    but nonetheless, I didn't want this to be taken all too seriously so I made a joke out of the title. 

    because it is such a rough sketch, the piano is out of tune, the singing is... needing some practice and the whistling needs substitution and revision, perhaps even a hired whistler to overlay a more decent track (I'm not the best whistler). 

    I put it to the video of the jabber jay scene in the hunger games because the second I started whistling in the mic and got the echo back, it reminded me of the hunger games. if you've seen the films then you know what I'm talking about. 

    the overwhelming nature of the birds attacking catniss is similar to the effects of ptsd, and the hunger games puts to vision a lot of what ptsd is like through catniss so I enjoy the films very much. 

    --- 

    oh the lyrics are just about the repetitive patterns I have gone through and my own personal reflection on that in sort of a dark light, getting drunk and high over and over ya know... just, expressing the high and what it feels like and how much I fucking love it. 

    and uh, then at the end I'm repeating lyrics from a song I wrote when I was young and living from couch to couch. "the sun begins a new day, I don't know where I'll end up, I don't know where I'm gonna stay." 

    and it's about the migrant life style and how the only structure I felt was sun rising and falling and it brought me absolute terror to see it come up because, you go through the same thoughts every morning, "where am I going to go now." and you usually have less than 24 hours to figure it out sometimes. 

    the song cuts off because I forgot the rest of the lyrics and, transitioned into a different song completely. 

    don't worry I have them written down in a notebook I keep. all my lyrics. that one's titled, "the sun", my friends love the guitar version of it which is much more chill, and they sing a long to it. it's much more meditative and solemn, almost reminiscent of the comforting low hum and vibration that puts you in that meditative state. I used to be obsessed with that low hum and the frequency of it being in music, the bass of it reaches inside you and makes you feel something that's better than most things. it's comfort I guess... idk. 

    I still am obsessed with "low tones" in bass lines, lower register vocals, and bass cleft musically. it's just a very important aspect of music to me is bass... 

    my car is rigged with subwoofers so heavy they'll make you melt, that's just what I like. haha its not music without some bass. 

    --- 

    the reason the vids all holographic-esc, transparent and glowy, and slow motion is because, I wanted to portray what it's like for me when I play the music personally what a deep meditative and spiritual experience it is. what it's like to be in it, that's what it feels like. how the video appears. 

    you float away... it's, something that happens when you do something you love with intent focus. it is important for mental health to have one hobby that you can "lose yourself" in... as such. weather it be music, art, or sailing, roller blading, whatever it is. that's your soul thing. 

    the concept of "losing oneself" is studied and presented by psychologists although I forget the proper terminology for it. 

    just thought I'd share that, I found it interesting. 

  • 3,278 posts

     

    blanc stated:

    aw thanks tony! I'm more fond of chicken wings as well. 

    this entire 5 part piece is meant to be sort of a journey through significant experiences in my life. 

    1. Neither Here Nor There (Chicken Wings) 0:00-3:25

    this song is about indifference and feeling low. the depth of emotion in this song makes my heart ache to listen to. 

    "since you've been gone, I can't feel a thing, it doesn't matter much to me. just a kid with a key, didn't mean much of anything, neither here nor there. if I'm being honest I can't feel a thing, haven't been the same sense everything, it doesn't matter much to me." 

    the entire song is to my brother, who's passed away. it starts out with the sound of trains passing by and the clicking of heels, distant traffic and voices to capture the extreme loneliness and hopelessness you feel when you are homeless. you feel like the world is just passing you by, you're at the bottom of it just watching, and you mean nothing, to no one. 

    this is the first song I've ever written about my brother because for the longest time I haven't felt entirely sure how I felt about any of it. I really wanted to know what I felt but, I came to the conclusion that I felt a sort of indifference that was, sad. 

    I just find it to be unfortunate that my brother's life was so insignificant... to most of the world. it goes on turning without him just fine, you know what I mean. to most people he was just another guy to hit up for drugs. when I say neither here nor there I am referencing purgatory, my family is half jewish, and I personally find most of my faith placed in this religious philosophy myself, 

    and, I think about how my brother, since he's been gone he's, no where. and it's an odd sensation to feel someone become nothing. it truly is. 

    it is the true feeling of absence, is what I was trying to capture in that statement. 

    I'm just finally owning up to how I really feel about it in this song which, is captured better with the song than with words... so I'll just leave it at that. some things just can't be explained. there is no description for what I felt. because it isn't an identifiable feeling or emotion, and yet, very much so is. there just isn't a term for it. 

    it's just something you go through when you lose someone. 

    "neither here nor there" is exactly how I feel myself, a lot of the time as well. so I thought it would be a good title. 

    but I wanted to include chicken wings as a representative title for my brother strictly, since it is for him. chicken wings just represents something symbolic in my and my brothers relationship growing up that only he and I know about. personal. 

    2. Popocatépetl 3:26-3:59

    this song is about a volcano in Mexico that I used to live near. it erupted ironically after I wrote this song, kind of weird. 

    the vision for this song was for you to see what is see when I remember Mexico. 

    I went through a lot in this country, probably too much to leave here but, it was, a lot. this song is just, remembering all of it. 

    3. Asylum 4:00-6:36

    and then in this song I snap out of the dream state, where I am remembering, my brother, being homeless, living in Mexico, and I sort of wake up and find myself walking down the hallway of an asylum. the sound of slamming vault doors is what brings me back to reality. 

    this song is about the time I spent in a mental facility, it was rather lonely and it felt extremely prison like, sterile, cold. I wanted the shutting of the doors to portray the way I felt about it. being so processed, lonely, factory like. inhuman. 

    just another number in a system, another diagnosis. 

    the reason this song is sort of tripped out sounding is because I was rather fucking high during my time in the mental facility, between all the drugs they had me on I was literally wavering in and out of consciousness. things were a blurry mess of color and sound most of the time, I just, felt hella drugged up. 

    4. Oasis 6:37-9:10

    oasis is a song about the crisis with Syrian refugees. I imagined them coagulating in areas surrounding water, like camels wandering through a desert. it is inspired imagery wise by what I've seen on the internet, I also studied the issue in my sociology course in school. so it was just on my mind. it bothered me. 

    5. Jump 9:11-10:40

    jump is about the Russian viral suicide game, and I intended it sound something similar to the soundtrack of the popular internet viral sport, parkour, which seems to have spun out of Russia more than anything and eventually made its way over to the u.s. Russian roulette is also something I'd factor into this video, at the time I was troubled by a suicide dream I had, where I put a gun to my head not knowing if it was loaded or not and pulled the trigger. the next day I OD'd on heroin attempting to kill myself, the dream was symbolic of what I was going through at the time. 

    It all ties together for me though within the aspect of suicide, and the dare devil nature of Russian originated games. the latest one being a game of suicide, entailing young teens jumping off of roofs to their deaths. the video footage of these deaths impacted me. 

    I wanted the song to sound like the feeling of reckless abandon, jumping from one roof to the next and then eventually, jumping off completely. just for the fucking hell of it. 

    that's Russian culture in a nut shell. haha

     

    Well you definitely managed to capture the essence of all these things. "Neither here nor There" from what heard would be your single. Sounds like sadness glorified inspired by Radiohead yet original.

    The rest is spine tingling. The melodies and those everyday sounds of society are creepy. I honestly have a sense of empathy for the madness I've witnessed/experienced in these tracks, and I'm left feeling disturbed in a slightly uncomfortable way, which I find fascinating.

    As an artist you can express your surroundings/perspective very well, and what you've done here is a taste of madness. For your own sake blanc, surround yourself with good people, and do this by preparing to accommodate them. I listen to this track 3 times so far and every time it's been a walk in darkness and uncertainty.

     

  • 4,433 posts

    Spatial Mind stated:

     

    blanc stated:

    aw thanks tony! I'm more fond of chicken wings as well. 

    this entire 5 part piece is meant to be sort of a journey through significant experiences in my life. 

    1. Neither Here Nor There (Chicken Wings) 0:00-3:25

    this song is about indifference and feeling low. the depth of emotion in this song makes my heart ache to listen to. 

    "since you've been gone, I can't feel a thing, it doesn't matter much to me. just a kid with a key, didn't mean much of anything, neither here nor there. if I'm being honest I can't feel a thing, haven't been the same sense everything, it doesn't matter much to me." 

    the entire song is to my brother, who's passed away. it starts out with the sound of trains passing by and the clicking of heels, distant traffic and voices to capture the extreme loneliness and hopelessness you feel when you are homeless. you feel like the world is just passing you by, you're at the bottom of it just watching, and you mean nothing, to no one. 

    this is the first song I've ever written about my brother because for the longest time I haven't felt entirely sure how I felt about any of it. I really wanted to know what I felt but, I came to the conclusion that I felt a sort of indifference that was, sad. 

    I just find it to be unfortunate that my brother's life was so insignificant... to most of the world. it goes on turning without him just fine, you know what I mean. to most people he was just another guy to hit up for drugs. when I say neither here nor there I am referencing purgatory, my family is half jewish, and I personally find most of my faith placed in this religious philosophy myself, 

    and, I think about how my brother, since he's been gone he's, no where. and it's an odd sensation to feel someone become nothing. it truly is. 

    it is the true feeling of absence, is what I was trying to capture in that statement. 

    I'm just finally owning up to how I really feel about it in this song which, is captured better with the song than with words... so I'll just leave it at that. some things just can't be explained. there is no description for what I felt. because it isn't an identifiable feeling or emotion, and yet, very much so is. there just isn't a term for it. 

    it's just something you go through when you lose someone. 

    "neither here nor there" is exactly how I feel myself, a lot of the time as well. so I thought it would be a good title. 

    but I wanted to include chicken wings as a representative title for my brother strictly, since it is for him. chicken wings just represents something symbolic in my and my brothers relationship growing up that only he and I know about. personal. 

    2. Popocatépetl 3:26-3:59

    this song is about a volcano in Mexico that I used to live near. it erupted ironically after I wrote this song, kind of weird. 

    the vision for this song was for you to see what is see when I remember Mexico. 

    I went through a lot in this country, probably too much to leave here but, it was, a lot. this song is just, remembering all of it. 

    3. Asylum 4:00-6:36

    and then in this song I snap out of the dream state, where I am remembering, my brother, being homeless, living in Mexico, and I sort of wake up and find myself walking down the hallway of an asylum. the sound of slamming vault doors is what brings me back to reality. 

    this song is about the time I spent in a mental facility, it was rather lonely and it felt extremely prison like, sterile, cold. I wanted the shutting of the doors to portray the way I felt about it. being so processed, lonely, factory like. inhuman. 

    just another number in a system, another diagnosis. 

    the reason this song is sort of tripped out sounding is because I was rather fucking high during my time in the mental facility, between all the drugs they had me on I was literally wavering in and out of consciousness. things were a blurry mess of color and sound most of the time, I just, felt hella drugged up. 

    4. Oasis 6:37-9:10

    oasis is a song about the crisis with Syrian refugees. I imagined them coagulating in areas surrounding water, like camels wandering through a desert. it is inspired imagery wise by what I've seen on the internet, I also studied the issue in my sociology course in school. so it was just on my mind. it bothered me. 

    5. Jump 9:11-10:40

    jump is about the Russian viral suicide game, and I intended it sound something similar to the soundtrack of the popular internet viral sport, parkour, which seems to have spun out of Russia more than anything and eventually made its way over to the u.s. Russian roulette is also something I'd factor into this video, at the time I was troubled by a suicide dream I had, where I put a gun to my head not knowing if it was loaded or not and pulled the trigger. the next day I OD'd on heroin attempting to kill myself, the dream was symbolic of what I was going through at the time. 

    It all ties together for me though within the aspect of suicide, and the dare devil nature of Russian originated games. the latest one being a game of suicide, entailing young teens jumping off of roofs to their deaths. the video footage of these deaths impacted me. 

    I wanted the song to sound like the feeling of reckless abandon, jumping from one roof to the next and then eventually, jumping off completely. just for the fucking hell of it. 

    that's Russian culture in a nut shell. haha

     

    Well you definitely managed to capture the essence of all these things. "Neither here nor There" from what heard would be your single. Sounds like sadness glorified inspired by Radiohead yet original.

    The rest is spine tingling. The melodies and those everyday sounds of society are creepy. I honestly have a sense of empathy for the madness I've witnessed/experienced in these tracks, and I'm left feeling disturbed in a slightly uncomfortable way, which I find fascinating.

    As an artist you can express your surroundings/perspective very well, and what you've done here is a taste of madness. For your own sake blanc, surround yourself with good people, and do this by preparing to accommodate them. I listen to this track 3 times so far and every time it's been a walk in darkness and uncertainty.

     

    why thank you  

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